Bah Bards.

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Bah Bards.

Postby arielyn » Mon Apr 25, 2005 9:38 am

Man, the guild leader is a bard and there isn't even a thread about bards here.

so here it is
my little thread
I play eq and
I go to bed.

Us bards are great
Don't You agree?
I'll BRB
I have to pee.

Ok I'm back
How come we wiped?
I sang mana song
And didn't Type!
I didn't pull
That 10 mob train
You better find
Someone Else to blame

I sing my songs
And play my drums
Man didn't SOE
Make our class dumb?
We sometimes slow
We sometimes haste
We sometimes Fight
But its a waste.

Our DPS is
Like a little girl
We're just missing
Some more hair curls.

We run around at
The speed of light
Yet no one wants us
to join the fight.

So we run around
In little circles
I cant think of anything that
Rhymes with circles
So we get real dizzy
till we fall down
Look at us!!!!!
The kiting Clowns!

Does that mob summon?
Does it AOE?
Does It cast Snare???
Shit it killed me!

Oh poor poor bards
We are the few
Who put up with the shit
That sony threw

*Here's an Idea*
We'll make a class
That Can do everything
But only half-ass

They'll pick some locks
That we wont make

They'll Tank some mobs
That they cant take

They'll buff a group
They give some haste

But just a little.....
Just a taste.

Oh, LET them mezz
but make it suck

So they'll get smacked
Like by a truck

And lets make them
Run really fast

So cliff diving dying
can be a blast

Lets give them safe fall
but just a little

man oh man,
Sony loves bard puddles

They'll slow some mobs
But heres the deed
There slows will suck
and groups wont need

They will track
but just for mobs
That are 5 feet away
So whats their job?

To run around
And Say out loud
amongst the crowd

The crowd will laugh
and Get a different class
because who really wants
A toon thats half ass

I see what happened
When Sony made us
They got a group together
and caused a fuss

we need a new class
the execs said
and brainstorming began
inside their heads

They Thought real long
and they thought real hard
And suddenly someone said
Lets make a bard

We'll pick the pieces
Of all the classes
And make them suck
make them half asses

Sony Agreed,
And There was bard
I bet god him self
Never laughed so hard

So here we are,
The bards of EQ

the end.

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Postby Kenak » Mon Apr 25, 2005 9:51 am

Bards are used for racking up a 100pt DS on unslowable mobs, and singing group DA song and using Fading Memories to train other players/guilds.
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Postby Kaylar » Mon Apr 25, 2005 10:02 am

OMG Ari that was some funny shit. LMAO I'm still laughing over the part of not finding anything to rhyem with circles.
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Postby Senyla » Mon Apr 25, 2005 11:02 am

-Huge Damage Shield
-Huge AE Resists with IM4 and JF3
-Mana/HP Regen on par with KEI that stacks with VOQ
-Haste (60%)
-Overhaste (30%)
-Nook increaser song
-Lull, Mez, Song of Highsun and FM make us pretty damn good pullers
-New DoN proc song adds a shit-ton of DPS to a group
-Group DA
-VERY low agro slows.... can sometimes pre-slow mobs on inc and I never get aggro (even on a resist)
-Harmony of Sound... drops all resists so debuffs, slows, etc can land on inc

It's disturbing that we're seen as worthless.... a Bard is a toolbox crammed with useful stuff.
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Postby arielyn » Mon Apr 25, 2005 11:51 am

um sen. i know we rock. 180 days played as ari.

too bad no one but bards know how hard we rock, hence my joke.

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Postby Vree » Mon Apr 25, 2005 12:48 pm

omg Aeri, omg omg I have laughing cramps
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Re: .

Postby Senyla » Mon Apr 25, 2005 1:53 pm

arielyn wrote:too bad no one but bards know how hard we rock, hence my joke.

I know it was a joke... I was just sharing in the bardic frustration :) ...and showing off "a little" about what we can do, for those that might not know.
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Postby Zyzzerzazz » Mon Apr 25, 2005 2:00 pm

Non-Bard opinion inc.....

Zyzzerzazz: Mr. Bard, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.


Bards are $ so long as they know their shit, like most classes.

Clerics can get aways with the old rule, if its hurt heal it. But bards, no.

If you have a team of bards who know the events and mobs down, bards fuckign ROCK! But needing to tell a bard what to do, kills the advantage)

Bards are so much fun, but most of they utility is being able to think on their feet and know what to do b4 being told.
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"Satisfaction guaranteed or 96% of your experience back!"
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Postby Windadar » Mon May 02, 2005 3:36 pm

I can line up the mobs like the control tower at an airport. MA’s attack never turns off. /XP on!!!!

Mana song anyone? :thumbup
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