someone sent this..it is soooo true

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someone sent this..it is soooo true

Postby Irish » Sat Oct 27, 2007 9:15 am

After having two BOYS, I can say this test is a good thing for someone to try. you see I thought having kids were fun as I worked with kids and they were great.... holy hell what was I thinking?!?!?! I forgot I sent them HOME every day to THEIR mommys and daddys.... mine are with me 24/7 even with Jason home I am the one that takes care of them while he goes off to his man cave ( IE: Computer room)


Okay, so you want to be a parent. I don't have any hangups on that. However, it must be warned to you that maybe you should take these 11 tests before thinking about having a "little bundle of joy" because I can tell you, it's pretty rough...



Car Test: Forget the Roler, it's the station wagon for you. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment and leave it there. Then get a pencil and stick it into the cassette player. Take a family size tub on deep fried chips and mash them into the back seat followed up by running a rake along both sets of doors. Now after driving the sabotaged vehicle 130 000 miles with a second engine, try and trade it in.

mine are not that bad.....yet we done let them eat in the car...as of yet


Dressing Test: Obtain one large, unhappy live giant squid and attempt to stuff it into a small net bag at all times making sure that all the arms stay inside.


WELL YEAH THIS CAN BE A PAIN JEREN WAS GOOD BUT CONOR...I STILL HAVE ISSUES




Stink Test: Smear honey, peanut butter and soy sauce all over the sofa and curtains. Place a fish stick and hermit crab behind the couch and leave both there for the entire summer.

WOW THAT HAS TO SUCK MINE ARE NOT THAT BAD..........YET...

Feeding Test: Obtain a large plastic milk jug and fill it half way with water. Suspend it from the ceiling on a cord and start the jug swinging. Try to insert spoonfuls of soggy cereal into the "mouth" of the jug whilst pretending it's a helicopter. Now dump part of the contents of the jug over your head and the rest on the floor.


DAMN THIS IS NEAR TRUE...OMFG IT IS A PAIN TO FEED A SCREAMING YOUNGING.....


Ingenuity Test: Take a tube of toilet paper and turn it into an Easter candle using only sticky tape and a piece of foil. Take and egg carton and make it into a happy rhino using only a pair of scissors and a pot of paint. Take a milk carton, and empty cereal box and a ping-pong ball to make an exact replica of the Eiffel Tower.


AWWW BUT THIS IS FUN............



Land-Mine Test: Get your partner to spread a giant box of Lego all over the house then put on a blindfold then endeavor to walk to the kitchen. Don't scream as this will wake up a child at night.


THIS DOES FRICKEN HURT!!!

Night Test: Prepare by obtaining a small cloth bag and fill it with 8 to 12 pounds of sand then soak it thoroughly in water. At 3pm start waltzing and humming with the bag until 9pm. Lay down the bag and set the alarm for 10pm. Get up and pick up the bag and sing every song you know. Make up about a dozen more sing these until 4am then set the alarm for 5am. Get up and make breakfast doing this entire procedure for the next 5 years. Look happy during the time you are doing this.


AND SO FAR I DONT THINK THEY GROW OUT OF IT CONOR HAD ME UP THREE TIMES THE OTHER NIGHT...............GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR





Physical Test (for men): Go to your nearest chemist and set your wallet on the counter. Ask teh shop assistant to help herself. Now proceed to the nearest supermarket. Go to the office and arrange your paycheck to be directly deposited to the store and purchase a race guide. Go home and read it quietly. It will be the last time ever.


NOT TRUE FOR JASON HE GOES HIDE IN THE COMPUTER ROOM WHILE I TAKE CARE OF HIS SPAWNS


Physical Test (for women): Take a large bean bag and attach it to the front of your clothes. Leave it there for nine months. Now remove 10 beans from it. Try not to notice the large closet full of clothes you have since you won't be wearing any of them for a while.


SOB :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry :cry







Shopping Test: Borrow a couple of small animals such as goats, ferrets or Tasmanian devils and take them with you as you shop. Always keep them in your sight, paying for anything they eat or damage.

OMFG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO TRUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IT IS EVEN FUNNER WHEN YOU ARE BY YOURSELF AND NO ONE TO HELP YOU

:help :help :help :help :help :help



Warn-Off Test: Find a couple who already have a small child and lecture them on how they can improve their method of bringing up the child including paitence, discipline, table manners and toilet training. Enjoy the experience for the last time in order to have an opportunity to get all the answers.



WHY SCARE THEM.. TELLL THEM HOW WONDERFUL IT IS SO YOU WON'T BE LONELY.... LOL
:thumbup


If you complete the course, well done. Not pleasant, is it? Now you know what it really is like to have a baby.





BUT YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU MIGHT HAVE TO GIVEV UP GAMING TIME, SLEEP, BELLYDANCING....(SOB...(AS YOU MIGHT LOOK LIKE A HIPO SHAKING OFF A FLY NOW... :cry :cry )
YOU HOT NIGHTS WITH YOUR HUBBY/WIFE GOIGN TO THE MOVIES WITHOUT KIDS. HAVING YOUR "OWN" TIME ALONE................

BUT IN THE END IT IS WORTH IT I WOUDL NOT GIVE UP MY BABIES FOR ALL THE MONEY IN THE WORLD :love

INJOY


KAT
IrishHealer Sunspeaker 75 Cleric Of Tunare, EVER SO PROUD member of Tribal Fury
I am NOT a DRAMA QUEEN .....I am the DRAMA GODDESS!! GET IT RIGHT...
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Postby ForsakerTrull » Sat Oct 27, 2007 10:04 am

My cat pisses me off but I think I can handle kids :finger

haha not!!!

Trull
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