Jokes

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Jokes

Postby Goofydoofy » Fri Jan 20, 2006 6:29 pm

In a recent study, scientists found that red wine is good both for the heart and for seducing hot coeds.

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A busy couple whose schedules allowed them to have sex only once a month bought a box of 12 condoms so they would be set for a year. Three months down the road, the wife went to get one and found the box empty. "What happened to the other 10 condoms?" she asked. He nervously replied, "Er, I masturbated with them." Later she shared the story with a male friend and asked, "Have you ever done that?" "Yeah, once or twice," he told her. "You mean you've actually masturbated with a condom?" she asked. "Oh," he said, "I thought you were asking if I'd ever lied to my wife."

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A man went into the library and asked the librarian to help him find a book on suicide. "Fuck off," the librarian replied. "You won't bring it back."

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Arielyn knelt in the confessional and said, "Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. I have committed the sin of vanity. Twice a day I gaze at myself in the mirror and tell myself how beautiful I am." The priest turned, took a good look at Arielyn and said, "My son, I have good news. That isn't a sin. It's simply a mistake."

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How is poker like sex? Everyone thinks they are the best, but most people don't know what they are doing.

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Goofydoofy
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