Something my Grandmother sent me

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Something my Grandmother sent me

Postby fendeesha » Sat Oct 30, 2004 11:49 pm

Can you believe it? My GRANDMOTHER e-mailed this to me today... LOL

Subject: Why did the Chicken Cross the Road?

GEORGE W BUSH

We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to
know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is
either against us or for us. There is no middle ground here.

JOHN KERRY

I voted to support the chicken crossing the road before I voted against
the chicken. I do not believe the chicken should have crossed the road
without the support of the French, Germans, and United Nations. Did I
mention I have three Purple Hearts?

COLIN POWELL

Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image
of the chicken crossing the road.

HANS BLIX

We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been
allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

RALPH NADER

The chicken's habitat on the other side of the road had been polluted
by unchecked industrial greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled
habitat on the other side of the road be-cause it was crushed by the
wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.

PAT BUCHANAN

To steal the job of a decent, hard-working American.

RUSH LIMBAUGH

I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was
getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet that somebody
out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with
crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of this
can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their
tax dollars. And when I
say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the government
took from you to build a road for chickens to cross.

MARTHA STEWART

No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a
standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price
dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider
information.

DR SEUSS

Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the
chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY

To die in the rain. Alone.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR

I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads
without having their motives called into question.

GRANDPA

In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody
told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS

Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the
chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of how it
experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its
life long dream of crossing the road.

JOHN LENNON

Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together - in
peace.

ARISTOTLE

It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX

It was an historic inevitability.

RONALD REAGAN

What chicken?

CAPTAIN KIRK

To boldly go where no chicken has ever gone before.

BILL GATES

I have just witnessed eChicken2004, which will not only cross roads,
but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your
checkbook and internet explorer is an integral part of eChicken.

ALBERT EINSTEIN

Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the
chicken?

BILL CLINTON

I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of
chicken?

AL GORE

I invented the chicken!

THE BIBLE

And God came down from heaven, and he said unto the chicken THOU SHALT
CROSS THE ROAD. And the chicken did cross the road, and there was much
rejoicing.

COLONEL SANDERS

Did I miss one?
The one and only (thank God!) FEN!
SIMPLY UN-FOOLED AROUND WITH!
fendeesha
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Postby Calthine Faeriesong » Sun Oct 31, 2004 12:13 pm

Yay Grandma! That's great.
Calthine Faeriesong
--------------
"Vengance is counterproductive, always. Not to mention the fact it gets your soul all sticky." Lady Sally McGee
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