Icky Story for the Day

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Icky Story for the Day

Postby Skel » Mon Dec 20, 2004 8:51 am

We can file this one under "Stupid Things Skel Does at Work".

Today is technically Monday, so naturally being insane enough to take 3rd shift i was in late Sunday night to open up my POS paper-bag machine. Now when you get a whole buncha bags you have to glue em all up inside a paper sleeve, and the sleeve gets sealed along the seam and sides. The paste for those seams comes from pots that i have to first fill and then connect to the machine. So i'm connecting the seam paste air regulator, and of COURSE the damn thing won't fit because that would be too easy. i was trained in how to fix this: place a metal paint scraper on the lip of the regulator and beat the everloving hell out of it with a big wrench, point being to tap the regulator down onto the pot. What could go wrong?

I'm beating away at this thing when the scraper slips onto my thumb just in time to get whacked by the wrench. Funny thing is, it didn't break the skin it just pinched it REALLY hard right on the meaty part (i.e. the fingerprint). So now i have a blood blister getting bigger and ouchier by the second. I head to the parts room (a.k.a. First Aid Room), grab a clean safety pin, and prepare to lance the blister. You know, to let it bleed out a bit and make sure it's all clean.

Blister EXPLODES. I've got blood on my thumb, on the needle, all over my other hand ... it's disgusting. But i can handle that because i cut up dead things all the time and THAT'S bloody ...

Anyway, I wanna kinda smoosh some of the blood out because there's still alot in there, but there's something ELSE in there too :cry Every time i squeeze out some blood, a bunch of slightly chunky white stuff comes out too. Now, i know for DAMN sure it's not an infection yet because this JUST happened, so i chalk it up to a freak phenomenon and go about my business (hey, it was late and i was very tired).

Only later on, when i'm thinking about it, so i realize what exactly your fingers are made of. Down at the tips (where i got hurt) there isn't any muscle at all ... it's just skin, blood vessels, and little pads of fatty tissue as a cushion. Yep that's right, I squished out my own finger-fat :puke

What's the point of this little story? I have now come to realize that i gave myself a small amount of liposuction today at work. I am now .00000001% LESS fatty than i was yesterday. I'm not quite sure how i feel about that, but i thought i'd share the story because everyone needs to read about exploding fingers now and then.
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Blister

Postby Goofydoofy » Mon Dec 20, 2004 9:19 am

Tastey.
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Postby Ayragon » Mon Dec 20, 2004 9:36 am

I hear finger fat is good on toast.

:spam:
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Postby rsix » Mon Dec 20, 2004 11:56 am

um thx.
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Postby Kinlen » Tue Dec 21, 2004 3:58 am

Don't you think you should find a safer job Skel?
Perhaps stuffing pillows or testing padded rooms?

:thumbup
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Postby cexser » Tue Dec 21, 2004 7:58 am

Damn Skel....I hope your fingor gets better.
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haha

Postby bill » Tue Dec 21, 2004 10:53 am

she has a finger. Fingor is an enchanter =p
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Postby fendeesha » Tue Dec 21, 2004 11:35 am

Skel, do they sell thumb guards? If they do, I am sure we can take up a collection and get you a couple! This is NOT the first thread about how you banged up your thumbs at work... (read as pls be careful in the future?)
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Postby Aboobaka » Tue Dec 21, 2004 1:46 pm

Yeah, I was expecting near the end of the story that the white things were actually pieces of shattered bone. Therefore, the story actually had a happy ending for me :razz
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Postby Conan » Tue Dec 21, 2004 3:40 pm

Beside that fact that that was totally gross I thought it was going to turn out to be bone as welll but finding out it was fat just made it grosser if thats a word lol nice story :thumbup
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ugh

Postby bill » Tue Dec 21, 2004 5:22 pm

I just want to derail this for a minute to mourn a lost name.

R.I.P. Conanofcimmeria.

Welcome Corfan to take his place. Fucking Corfan....
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Postby fendeesha » Thu Dec 23, 2004 7:05 am

WTH Dran? New nemesis or what?
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Postby Serano » Thu Dec 23, 2004 11:32 am

conan got his name nerfed to Corfan.
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Postby fendeesha » Fri Dec 24, 2004 10:09 am

Aha.
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